The Committee

As has been noted before in these pages, our house runs on a committee structure. Whenever Connor or Helen asks me a question that can't be answered immediately, I tell them I'll take it up with the committee.

Over the years, Connor has appealed several times to be a voting member on the committee. He even staged a vote last year, where all of his stuffed animals joined him to unseat me. But, unfortunately for Connor, the committee did not accept the vote.

Connor learned a little bit about governments and oppression when we were in England and France and yesterday, he told me that he was going to hold "a vote of no confidence" to unseat me from the committee.

Given that he had a lesson on how to overthrow a castle, and Helen has been pumping her fist demanding justice an awful lot, I'm starting to get a little concerned!

Elaine

Around the House Week 5: Memories



One thing I love about decorating for Christmas is pulling memories out of boxes one by one. Children, of course, can ruin this - because at least in my children's case, they want to get all the decorations up as fast as possible. Pausing to remember when certain things came into their life is rarely on their agenda. They also want to put up as many decorations as possible, which easily overwhelm.

 

In the midst of decorating chaos this week, I pulled out a set of silver penguins that I still remember purchasing years ago. It was a lazy Saturday that I spent wandering around Old Town, a few weeks after Christmas. Seeing them reminded me of all the time I used to have, rarely feeling rushed. Perhaps this season they can serve to remind me to slow down.

 

I put hand-dipped beeswax candles in my proud penguins this year. Connor and Helen made the candles after Helen's 4th birthday. The kit was a gift from a friend who left her school shortly thereafter.

 

I'm looking forward to watching them light the evening.

 

 

Elaine

Around the House: Week 3 Pets

When I was growing up, I had a dog. Friends who didn't have a dog or cat would often talk their parents into oddball pets that never worked out well - lizards, snakes, mice...

As it turns out, I would never want to own a dog or cat. This means that my children have turned into the kids with all the oddball pets - and they never work out. At present, we have two guinea pigs, two hermit crabs, and four birds. The birds are totally my fault, because I like them and Ed purchased a pair for me back in the day before we had child rearing responsibilities. The birds bred, a lot, and we used to have many, many more. The bird population has dwindled, but I cannot get rid of the ones I have left because they all look like death warmed over. They are well past their average life expectancy.

The guinea pigs are a disaster. Originally, I approved the purchase of hamsters, but Ed had the bright idea to do research, and his research suggested that guinea pigs make better pets. What he did not tell me was that guinea pigs live SEVEN years, and hamsters live TWO. If we had hamsters, they would probably be dead now or very close to dead. As it is, Ed has to clean the guinea pig cage every week or two (a condition of the purchase), we all feed them whenever we remember, and nobody actually plays with them except when Connor or Helen has a friend over. In other words, we have all the down sides to owning a pet, none of the up sides.

I actually love the hermit crabs. Connor received these as a gift from Ed's dad when we were vacationing in Cape May this past summer. We started out with three, but one died when we were vacationing in California. Connor, for the most part, has forgotten about them - though occasionally he does thank me for feeding them. I moved the hermit crabs from their travel home (a tiny cage that can be carried around) to an aquarium we had in the basement. We had this aquarium, by the way, because I had gotten it from a free listserv when we were going to get hamsters. So I guess it's good we didn't get the hamsters after all?

I'm counting the days until the birds die and have been desperately trying to give the guinea pigs away. In fact, after a shedding a few tears, Connor seemed to understand how we needed to get rid of the pigs and in a moment of weakness, I told him he could get a fish instead. But the crabs? I spend my evenings trying to sneak up on them while they're wandering around looking for food. Whenever they sense I am near, they hunker down and hide inside their shells - so stealthy!

 



Elaine

Around the House: Week 2

Ed and I purchased our home almost three years ago. Since then, we have had a lot of renovations completed. We're fortunate that most of the work has been done by one man, who is regularly astounded by our home's oddities.

Last weekend, one of our hot water heaters started leaking. It is completely fortunate that Ed noticed this, because neither of us is often in this room of our labyrinth of a basement. Ed was down there turning fuses off so he could install a new light for our front yard - which has been broken for months, but we finally made it to the hardware store to purchase a new one.

We called our usual handyman up, and he was able to come over. His first goal was trying to figure out if our two hot water heaters (which are in different rooms) were somehow connected. To find this out, he followed the many pipes that lead between the two rooms.

Usually when he is at our house, he can keep from laughing, and hold his expression to one of shock and amusement. This time, he actually burst out laughing when he saw all of our home's pipes and told us it looked like we were in the basement of an apartment building.

I'm thinking that was not a compliment.

Elaine

Around the House: Week 1

Meet Pico.

Pico is a gnome who lives at our home. He sits quietly on a shelf all day long, but will often join us for dinner.

Pico has very sensitive ears, so it is extremely important that if you sit near him, you speak softly so as not to harm him.

Last weekend, Helen cleaned up his apartment a bit, which has led to her checking on him more regularly, to make sure he is comfortable.

A few days ago, I decided Pico must get a little lonely sitting all by himself during the day, so I made him a friend.

Even with a friend, Pico sits and makes not a single sound all day long in his very tidy apartment.

Oh, if only we could all live like that some days!

Elaine

Starting the New Year with Less Clutter

Before Ed and I headed off to Albany for Christmas, we collectively decluttered the main floor of our house - except for a few "dumping grounds". We came back from Albany with loads of loot (compliments of Santa and Grandma Lynn) and realized that our current organization system was at its breaking point.

Ed banished himself to the basement where toys go to die in our house, and was able to nearly fill my home office with discards for the next person who walks in my home with a toddler. Don't say you weren't warned. There's loads of floor space now and it is finally an inviting playspace. He removed the storage cabinet doors so they would function as shelves, and now the kids can actually see the toys. Novel idea, I know! These shelves now house the musical instruments and most of the toy cars / planes / tractors, etc. Ed also tossed out all furniture on our patio that we one day hoped to restore. It's never going to happen, and it's embarrassing telling company to please not sit on a particular chair because it can't hold anything that weighs more than Helen (a robust 27 pounds these days).

I took to the main floor of the house and managed to (1) get the illegal daycare center that Helen runs under control; (2) get the building toys onto a hard surface so Connor didn't have to deal with building on carpet; (3) toss out a few bags of trash; (4) move all outside toys to bins in deck - a project accomplished mostly by Connor; and (5) construct a marble run with Connor though admittedly, he ran out of energy for the project before I did.

Behold!

Plan toys, stacked on upper shelves, grocery store near couch, FLOOR SPACE!

Helen's illegal daycare, which has been a baby hospital lately with lots of babies with broken arms. She insisted the "hospital vacuum" be added.

Most of the marble run - more pieces to come!

What you can't see are the neat boxes of legos, trains, and track pieces and the lovely set of shelves with many beautiful handmade toys. Every time I cleared a space, Helen couldn't wait to go play in it - so not only does the house look better, it's way more functional with a lot less stuff! Now, hopefully she doesn't notice how many things were removed!

Happy New Year, all!
Elaine

Painting the House

Our house has lacked "curb appeal" since we moved in. For starters, part of it was randomly painted brown. The landscaper who worked with me on the front yard told me that it needed to go. The roofer told me it was really ugly, and I know a few other people commented.

A few weeks ago, Ed decided to paint the random brown part of our house white. Wow. It makes a huge difference. And not just because it'll be easier for me to see the outline of a child if they ever attempt an escape via that window.

Connor was delighted to help paint this part of the house. Ed was delighted that one of the roofers agreed to paint the part of the house that was very difficult to get to, and required someone who knew how to climb around on a steep roof.

Elaine

Pink Chair and the Introduction of "Backsies"

Sometimes, I regret a move I make as soon as I make it, but once the cat is out of the bag, there's nothing I can do to put it back in. And so it is with some recent decisions I made.

#1. Some months ago, I purchased a cute little blue couch for the kids to share. I set it up in Helen's illegal daycare, where she is required to spend hours upon hours each day tending to at least a dozen babies. Feeding them, burping them, taking them on walks in the stroller, changing their diapers, requesting my assistance in changing their clothes, and, you know, ignoring them. Just like what I imagine happens in all illegal daycares. I thought the introduction of a couch was an awesome addition so that rather than running herself ragged all day, Helen could just grab a cigarette, light up, and do a crossword puzzle while all the babies sat there ignored by her. It was a perfect plan, except Connor loved the blue couch. He loved it so much, in fact, that I put it on wheels so he could fly it around the house all day as he traveled from city to city in his new airplane.

I'll give you a moment to imagine the bickering induced by this couch.

OK, now go get an aspirin to calm that headache.

#2. I purchased a SECOND child sized chair - this time, a pink chair. The idea was that now that we had TWO child-sized pieces of upholstered furniture, each child could have one. The couch was superior for it's size, the chair was superior for it's alluring color.

It totally worked for exactly one morning when Connor ran out to the couch, sat on it and claimed it as his own and Helen ran to the pink chair, exclaimed how beautiful and perfect it was. Which made Connor decide he wanted it. Seriously.

And so...for the next several weeks, whenever Helen would come downstairs in the morning, she would instantly plant her little bottom in the pink chair, and Connor would complain about how unfair life was. How Helen always got to have the pink chair. On the off-chance that he go to the pink chair first, he would lounge around in it possessively, and occasionally I would notice that he needed to do something important - like go to the bathroom - and he would avoid doing so, lest Helen plop her rear end in the chair. Which leads me to #3.

#3. I taught the children about "backsies". In case you didn't grow up in my house and are not familiar with this, it's the practice of leaving a location, calling "backsies", thus reserving the location for future use. It could apply to a piece of furniture, a record, a television show - you name it.

And then, the worst thing of all, Ed piped up with "no backsies".

AUGH! Are you kidding me?

It was bad when the kids were scrambling for one chair and then arguing about it. It was worse when there were two chairs to argue about. And then it got even worse when "backsies" was introduced. But now?!? They can argue about the chair AND whether or not "backsies" can be implemented.

Elaine

62 Months Old!

Dear Connor,

You steadily cruise into your 5th year on this Earth and I must say, you are rocking it. Totally, dude. People regularly ask me how you and Helen are and I always respond "fantastic - I am in the glory days of parenting". And I know that life can change in an instant, but these days? Life is good. Really good. Not perfect, mind you, but good.

Last Friday, several moms and I were sitting around in Helen's parent-child class discussing various issues related to your school's Fall Festival. This year, I was in charge of building a marble run (total success), coordinating volunteers (successful only because some friends of mine with no connection to the school came and volunteered for several hours), writing descriptions and pricing over 200 silent auction items (along with various other administrative tasks), making jump ropes before the festival, and baking 4 dozen cookies. It was a lot. Another mom asked me how I could do it all and I looked at her and said "because I have an incredible 5 year old in my house". I remember the days of struggling as a parent with a two year old and pregnant with another child (the position she's in). Life was a lot harder then, because your needs were rather intense. But now? I come home from work, and almost every day, I can start dinner while you and Helen play either outside in our backyard, in the neighbor's backyard, or find some project you can do in the kitchen beside me. It's really wonderful to see. I hope the two of you stay friends like this forever.

So why are things going so well? For starters, you rock the sleep world, almost always - and you make mornings easy. There were a few days this month where you would bound down the stairs early and happily announce "I had a nightmare" which can be a free pass into my bed. Not so, when it's clear you aren't in distress. You asked how I knew you hadn't had a nightmare and did attempt to perfect your acting a bit. Nice try, friend. Mostly though, you sleep until well after your wake-up light comes on, you get dressed, you eat breakfast, and your off! Seriously. You don't even say good-bye to your dad or me most days after morning verse at your school. You just run off to play with your friends.

And, although you could use a little more one-on-one time, you're making it work. And I appreciate that.

Grandma Carlene and Grandpa Rodney came for a visit and, as always, came bearing presents. This, you like. However, you continue to be unimpressed with clothes as a gift, and you don't mind telling your grandparents this.

Your grandpa Dick also came to visit - also bearing gifts. You are now the proud owner of roller skates! While he was here, we visited a dairy farm and you announced you would like to be a farmer and live there. That's too bad, really, because that means we won't be living together. Here's a little note to you. Farming is really hard work.

We also went to an orchard and picked a couple of bags of apples. After we had paid for the apples, you saw some fresh cider. You asked your dad to buy it and, already tired of waiting in lines and ready for the day to end, we both told you we'd just get some at the store this week. You pointed out that fresh from the farm is better, something we learned while visiting our CSA farm with Grandpa Dick when we got to have fresh pressed cider which you declared to be "better than candy". You had a point about this. We got back in line and purchased from the farm.

The number. Oh, the numbers. You love counting, and thinking about sets of numbers (yes, Daddy is four sets of 10!), and have recently become fascinated with mutiplying things by 10 and 100. Oh dear me, please become fascinated in something else...soon. Although, I will admit, I'm a fan of the numbers, too!

You have become my official kitchen floor cleaner, which is awesome. You love to spray the floor and wipe away the smudge. In fact, you like it so much that you once asked me to come get you whenever I saw a spot, even if you were sleeping. Consider yourself hired! I'm recording it here in case you ever become a less dedicated worker.

You made me laugh a few nights ago when, in the middle of the night, I overheard you muttering "oh dear", something you had also said when you spilled milk at dinner. You get this from me. You even asked me why I say "oh dear" and I told you "I don't like to yell, so I've decided to say 'oh dear' to give myself a little time to process my feelings before I say anything".
You are truly a positive force in my life and the lives of others, Connor. We've talked before about how you can choose to be happy or you can choose to be angry and I'm grateful that these days, at least, you're choosing to be happy. The world has so much to offer. Grab it!

Love,
Mommy

My CSA is Causing Me to Sneak Around

For the past several years, our household has participated in Community Supported Agriculture - CSA. First, we were members of Great Country Farms and for the past two years, we've been members of Waterpenny Farm. Over the years, we've had a lot of fun visiting our CSA farm.

Our current farm plants loads and loads of tomatoes - and we love that. It's among the reasons we're at Waterpenny this year rather than at GCF (last year, we had half-shares in both farms). The produce is fantastic at Waterpenny, it is exactly the kind of family farm I want to support, but it has one problem. Besides tomatoes, their second bumper crop is squash. I don't actually like squash. I eat it every week because I like throwing food away even less than I like eating squash.

A few weeks ago, I decided to turn that squash into zucchini bread, except I knew it would not be well received labeled that, so I called it cinnamon bread instead. Connor and Helen love cinnamon bread, particularly Connor. Last time I made it, I just dumped the squash in without Connor taking note. Today, Connor and Helen were both helping me when I added the "secret ingredient". I had pureed the squash a couple of days before, and Connor and Helen definitely did not recognize it. I tossed it in the batter, telling them it was time for the secret ingredient to be added.

As expected, Connor is dying to know what the secret ingredient is. But I'm scared to tell him, because I'm pretty sure as soon as I do, I'll be eating those three dozen frozen muffins and two loaves of bread by myself, since Connor will surely reject them.

And so it is, that I am grateful to have used up all of this week's and last week's squash, but I'm feeling very guilty about sneaking it in on Connor, when he would most definitely object.

I'm refusing to tell him what it is for the good of the Earth, I swear.

Elaine

Thank you Helen and Connor...and my German roots

Yesterday, I told Ed in front of both Helen and Connor that I needed my children to sleep at night. And, apparently they were listening in on our conversation. Helen went to sleep around 10:00 and slept until 3:00 - and she might have slept longer except she stirred a bit and I decided to go ahead and feed her. Miraculously, she went back to sleep immediately after finishing her meal and slept until just past 7:00. Connor, bless his heart, stayed in his room the entire night, and didn't come bounding into my room until after 6:00. I was feeling so good that after he had his morning bottle, I went downstairs and played with him which meant Ed got to sleep until Helen woke him up. Normally, Ed is the designated waker with Connor because I have spent at least an hour with Helen in the middle of the night trying to coax her back into sleep and I am too tired to entertain the thought of getting out of bed when Connor is ready. Let's just say, we are all feeling good. Right now, Helen and Connor are napping and Ed is running an errand. Usually, either Ed or I need to take advantage of naptime by napping ourselves - sometimes both of us!

With all that sleep, it seemed only natural that we would tackle the landscaping project again today. This time, Helen and I helped out. I figure my German ancestors are quite proud that I had Helen napping out in the cool weather this morning. I can almost hear my mom telling me how good the fresh air was for her.

After toting a few loads of mulch in his new wheelbarrow, Connor decided he'd rather serve as project foreman.


Elaine