Happy 33 month birthday, Connor

Dear Connor,

Yesterday, you turned 33 months old. Someday, you will be sitting around in a bar marveling at the number 33 and its significance on the side of a Rolling Rock bottle. Right now, it's just a big number, like all of the other numbers over 4, I suppose.

You impressed me and your dad this month by really trying your hand at logical reasoning. Our County has had the brilliant idea to place speed bumps on pretty much any side streete that is good for cutting between two larger streeets - a so-called "traffic calming measure". However, they are manufactured such that a firetruck can still go down the street without slowing down. Your dad mentioned that we ought to get a car with wheels like a fire truck, and I quickly agreed that this would be a good idea. But you squelched our dreams when you piped up from the backseat and pointed out that our driveway is not large enough for a fire truck. Dream. Crushed. Another day, we were looking at a book with many animals and when we got to the reindeer, you told us that reindeer like the rain.

You regularly tried your hand at being a reporter, and some manifestations of this are quite annoying. I like it when you tell me everything you've done during the day - for example, today the first thing out of your mouth was "I went to the store today and got you a card", which I think was supposed to be a secret. But you also have this penchant for repeating everything that is newsworthy in your mind. A typical conversation might be:
"May I have a piece of cake?"
"Yes, you may have a piece of cake."
"Daddy, Mommy said I could have a piece of cake."

-or-

You'll ask why about some random thing that nobody but you is interested in, and then you'll tell whomever else is in the room what the person who answered you said, because apparently you don't realize that everyone else can hear. Or, the information is just so amazing that you want to make certain everyone else has heard.

And this happens all.the.time.

You also have decided to defer almost all questions asked of you. Your dad might ask what you did at gymnastics and you'll turn your head and ask me "What did I do at gymnastics" and no matter how often either of us says we want you to answer, you refuse. I guess you don't want to be wrong, or accidentally reveal something.

After reading green eggs and ham one night, you came up with your own rhyme for me. You were bouncing on the bed and asked me "Would you eat them on a truck? Would you eat them with a buck?". I obligingly told you "no".


You use the word "dude" often and a few times, you have referred to me as "wife". This typically happens when you're with your dad and he has referred to me as such, but it sounds a lot funnier out of your mouth.

You have been quite into teaching Helen how to play with toys. You will very diligently give her an object and then snatch it from her and show her the proper way to use it. She seems to enjoy it, as do you. I think it might be because she now sits up almost all of the time, which probably makes her seem like a real person to you - not just a baby lying around all the time.

You made me laugh a million times - often thinking about the day you brought your dad a handful of poop in the morning. I am still very grateful that he was on the side of the bed you came to and not me.

Helen's sleep completely fell apart this month, so for perhaps the only time in your life, you are not the worst sleeper in the house. Thank you, Connor, for sleeping through most nights. I'm not sure we could make it very long if we were still getting up with both of you.

Love,
Mommy

Anniversary wrap-up

Today, Ed and I celebrated our 7th anniversary. I wished him "Happy Anniversary" this morning as I gathered up Helen to take her to the audiologist. His response? Total silence. My thought? "This is going to be an AWESOME year."

This sort of exemplifies how communication can be tough when there are two little people needing lots of attention on a regular basis. My mind was half on getting out the door and remembering how to get to the audiologist's office and Ed's mind was racing to figure out what he could offer the little man for breakfast - because, uh, Ed bought the WRONG KIND OF OATMEAL!!! He bought the kind that already has banana in it and that is NOT the kind of oatmeal Connor eats. And Connor is not one to give a person a break on this sort of issue because, really, bananas should be eaten separate from oatmeal because that is how it has always been done in Connor's gastronomie.

Rather than leaving wondering whether Ed heard me and was not equally happy about the day or he simply hadn't noticed I had spoken to him, I went back and asked him - and it turns out the latter was correct. Phew. Because I really, really don't want to do this job alone or with anyone else. I'm simply not up for it.

We celebrated by eating a giant cookie - which was actually purchased for Mother's Day - but Connor was feeling under the weather last night and it wouldn't have been right to cut into it without him.

Happy Anniversary, Ed. Thanks for taking care of Helen last night. She'll learn to sleep again, I just know it.

Elaine

Happy Mother's Day

Connor has always had a penchant for doing something special on Mother's Day. When he was 7 months old, he slept in - for possibly the only time the entire year. I can't remember how late it was, but my best guess is 7AM - and I know that sounds ridiculous that 7AM could possibly be considered sleeping in - but at the time, it most certainly would have been. This year, we celebrated Mother's Day at the Nats game. Connor's gift? He fell asleep on Ed's lap for the first 7 innings of the game, and was happy to sit on Ed's lap for the remainder of the game. I didn't even have to get to the juice box bribe. He was actually feeling a bit under the weather.

Helen had a different take on Mother's Day. She figured she should wake up bright and early (5:30!) to start celebrating. Lucky for me, Helen is quite content to eat and then jabber and play with the 300 toys I keep near my bed for such occasions while Ed and I attempt to get a bit more rest. And wow, we need that rest. I do believe I underestimated how taxing this job could be before I started it.

Elaine

How do you decide?

Parents of multiple children are often asked which of their children is their favorite. And they almost always answer that they don't have a favorite - which didn't make much sense until I had my own two children, and realized that each of them bring such unique things to my life. Even though both of my children are very young, I already adore them immensely.

What would life be without Connor, who is in such a hurry to figure everything out that he literally runs almost everywhere he goes? Tonight he came home from swimming lessons, burst through the door, and could hardly contain his excitement as he told me about the ice cream he and Daddy had brought home for me. "Do you want to eat it out on the porch with me Mommy? Do you like ice cream? You should save some of your ice cream so you can have it on your birthday, Mommy!"

And Helen? She is so mellow, and it was such an absolute pleasure to get to watch her splashing around in the bath tonight. A rare moment indeed since normally Connor is in there with her and the lifeguard on duty must make certain both children are reasonably safe. She looked so pleased as she splashed her legs, and so surprised when she leaned forward and actually touched her forehead to the water. One night, Connor dumped a whole cup of water on her head. Her reaction? She looked surprised, but blinked her eyes and kept on smiling.

Where Connor wanted nothing to do with strangers as a baby, which always made me feel very special, Helen is often happy to be held by strangers. But, when she sees me she always lights up, which also makes me feel very special.

Connor can do so many things and express so many things that it is impossible not to laugh with him daily. But even though Helen pretty much just sits around all day, it is impossible not to notice how much fun she has in her own little world, which is also infectious.

And, even though both of my children smile often, they rarely smile at the same time in the same photo, which always makes me have to decide which photo to choose. Take these, for example. I wanted a photo that showed Connor building a house with his new playstands. The first photo captures his enthusiasm - but since the house was ostensibly built for Helen, it seemed appropriate to post a photo with both of them.



Here, Helen is laughing, but Connor looks goofy.


And in this one, Helen looks great again, but you can't see Connor's face.


Finally, there's this one which is one of Connor's better photos, but Helen isn't even smiling.


This photo is probably the best compromise between the looks on both of their faces.


I just couldn't decide.
Elaine

PS: In case it is one of my children reading this post, rest assured, YOU are my favorite.

PPS: Mom, this may not be exactly what the blankets you made were designed for, but we needed something larger than our standard blanket, so we put them to work.

Go Nats!

I have purchased Helen exactly two outfits - and both of them were deeply discounted. On closing day of RFK last year, there was a huge merchandise sale. The store was mobbed with discount seekers, but I barreled in, giant belly and all, to grab this little ditty. I am so glad I did!

Good morning, Daddy!

Often, Connor comes bounding into our bedroom to greet us in the morning. He's usually skipping and almost always shouting "I want to play with you!", though we have worked very hard to get him to follow those words by jumping into bed, snuggling under the covers, and having some milk before jumping all over and demanding we get out of bed. Saturday, things went a bit differently.

Lucky for me, Helen woke up early so I brought her into bed with Ed and me to nurse her back to sleep for another hour. That left Ed with the outside bed position. And wow, was that a good thing. The first words Ed heard from Connor? "I need someone to help me flush these poopies". Ed's response "Connor?!?" My response from across the bed? "Good work Connor!" because I had heard Connor in the bathroom and assumed he had taken a dump and just couldn't get the toilet flushed.

Not so, apparently. Connor had both hands full of poop (thankfully, little hard balls, much like that of a rabbit) and needed help flushing because he couldn't figure out how to lift the lid and dispose of the poop.

Best we were able to put together, Connor woke up and went poop. But you have to give the little fellow credit because he then realized he didn't have a diaper on, and he figured he better clean the mess up. But, while toddlers may be enthusiastic about cleaning up messes, they rarely do it very well. So Ed was left to stumble out of bed, open the toilet, trace Connor's footsteps to be sure to sanitize the area and get rid of any remaining poopie. Needless to say, I never in my wildest dreams imagined that someday either Ed or I would be awakened by a person showing us a fistful of poop and innocently requesting help disposing it.

And, because it was Ed that was greeted by that site, I guess I did mean it. "Good work, Connor!".

For the record, while Ed was a bit disoriented, he is very forgiving. Today, he took Connor on a little paddle around the tidal basin.



Elaine

I'm supposed to do what with that?

We've started solids in the house. Only trouble is, Helen may act like she wants to eat, but I have yet to be convinced she's eating anything. But, it has inspired Connor to mock her by waving HIS messy hands around, tossing his spoon, and generally being a mess at dinner - so he's enjoying it.

As for Helen, what she lacks in skill, she makes up for with enthusiasm.


Elaine

Always be prepared.

In a few weeks, we will take a friend up on her offer to go camping. Obviously, this is a terrible idea, but there are some things of our pre-kid life that we are ready to reclaim, and one of them is the occasional camping trip.

No doubt, Connor will have fun. Our friends have a toddler about the same age, so together I'm certain they will figure out how to encrust themselves in dirt and hopefully, they will figure out how to completely exhaust themselves so they fall asleep at some point.

Following the boy scout motto to always be prepared, Connor and Ed went to a sporting goods store today and came home with an enormous tent (that will hopefully fit a matress for Connor, a matress for Ed and me, and Helen's pack-n-play). Connor got his own sleeping bag - that I am very hopeful he will pass out in at some point.

Those items were all on the list. A list, I might add, that I have been talking to Connor about a lot, trying to curb his desire to purchase everything when we go places. You see, I simply tell him before we go to the toystore or Target, or wherever, that we made a list of things we needed and even though we might see things we don't need that we want, we're only going to buy the things on the list. As far as I know, Connor can't read, so I can actually amend the list as I like with no consequences. But he has gotten to the point where he totally respects the list. (Not that I actually take him shopping much, but when I do, he knows we're only getting our list items.)

Ed needs to adopt a list approach to shopping. I say this because even though Ed is clearly the more even-keeled when it comes to shopping, and even more clearly he owns only about one-tenth of all the crap in the house, he has a complete inability to say no to Connor when it comes to buying stuff - even though Ed is the first to point out that little man needs to get rid of some of his stuff. Case in point? Last year, I sent them to Target to get a mock like-a-bike. What did they come home with? The mock like-a-bike (which Connor is still too short for), another little bike - which totally goes against the like-a-bike as it is traditional in every sense of the word (that conversation we had about why I wanted to get the like-a-bike instead of a traditional bike for Connor? forgotten), and an enormous blue and yellow plastic dumptruck. When they got home, Ed explained that Connor was too short for the item they were sent to get, but the other bike looked smaller (it is not) and it seemed like Connor would be ready for it (he is not) and after wearing me down about the bike, he started in on how Connor had spotted the dumptruck and he drove it all through Target, and brought joy to every shopper there, and how could I even think of asking him to pry it out of Connor's hands rather than just pay for the damn thing?

This time when the two of them went shopping, they came home with one additional item. A fishing pole. It was raining outside, and Connor told Ed they needed to keep it dry on the way to the car. Because, uh, I guess fishing poles that are in their new plastic container are really precious and rain might make them melt. Sensing that keeping the pole dry was probably not possible, Connor looked up at Ed and said "I can dry it off with my shirt", which he did once they were in the car. Problem solved.

Connor's first words out of his mouth when he got home were about the fishing pole, and when I looked at him and asked him if it was on the list, he got a very worried look on his face. He looked at me knowing he had violated a very important shopping rule, and he was probably wondering if Ed was going to get in trouble for violating this very important rule. Rather than taking the opportunity to lie (which he is totally willing to do in other circumstances when he is caught red handed) and tell the that it was on the list, Connor just stared at me, because I guess he knew since I can read and he can't, he doesn't have much standing in the debate about whether an item is on the list or not. I then looked at Connor and said "don't worry, Connor, you can keep that super cool, groovy fishing pole, Daddy must have seen it and decided to add it to the list". Relief appeared on Connor's face as he went on to tell me about his tackle box, and the worms, and can you help me open this, pleeeease?

And yes, Eamon, we plan to share the precious fishing pole with you so we can all enjoy fishing in a few weeks, along with camping. Because two toddlers near water with a pole and a net? That is such a good idea!

Elaine

Helen's 6 month visit

Forgot to report, yesterday, Helen had her belated 6 month check-up. Her height (which was measured incorrectly since she was screaming her head off) is at the median (she's actually shorter than this, but I certainly wasn't going to point out to the nurse how much she moved and encourage a new measurement be taken) and her head size is 40th percentile. And her weight? SHE IS STILL ON THE GROWTH CHART - checking in at the 10th percentile. When he got to the number, Dr. B said "We'll take it!" and appeared to be as excited as I was that she didn't dive off the chart like Connor did.

She was asked to perform one stunt - sitting - and she somehow managed to do it long enough to get the A-OK, though this is really a skill she has picked up in the last couple of days. (Nice job, Elaine, waiting to take your kid to their 6 month appointment long enough that they'd be able to pass the skills test. I think I'll pat myself on the back and have a margarita - oh wait, I did that last night as Ed and the au pair struggled to put both kids to bed.)

Her pediatrician's overall assessment? She's perfect.

I couldn't agree more.

Of course, after the pediatrician left, she had the hearing in her right ear tested AGAIN, and AGAIN, she failed. This time, she was super still and quiet, which is a big change from the other tests. Before the test, the pediatrician and I agreed that if she failed, we'd just wait until she was 1 before trying again. I should probably consult with my friend the audiologist about this before I continue to blow off Helen's repeated failure in the right ear.

Connor enjoys the new pediatrician because there's a nearby park. He told the au pair he wanted to eat his lunch really fast so he could play more. He showed that he has fully reached the "tell Mommy everything phase". His first words to me when I met him at the park were "Mod told me to pee on the tree over there". Connor knows I do not approve of this, but Mod told me she wasn't sure where a nearby bathroom was (uh, the library across the street? the pediatrician's office across the street?). I told Connor that in limited circumstances one had to make do with the great outdoors. Later that afternoon, he announced to me that he was going to pee on our tree. Not so, I told him. Thankfully, Ed reinforced this by telling him that he could only pee on trees when there was no bathroom nearby - but in our yard, he could ALWAYS go inside. I found this shocking, as I imagined Ed would be all jazzed about Connor breaking the no peeing in Mommy's yard rule so he could break it to.

Elaine

One more year to decide

As it turns out, my parents have only been married 39 years - not nearly as impressive as FORTY, so we have much time to decide where we'll go to celebrate. As my mom pointed out, at least I'm consistent in my desire to celebrate everything a year early, as I once gave her a book on turning 50 the year she turned 49. I think I played it off as a way to look forward to turning 50, but I didn't fool anyone.

And...in vacation voting...Connor votes for a golf resort. With a year to practice, he should be able to whoop up on just about everybody in the family.


Elaine